You googled WHAT?

When researching a storyline it’s not uncommon to google something peculiar and not in keeping with your day to day life. Baby Number Two is my current WIP and from the title you can already imagine there will be some interesting google searches during its completion. What really fascinates me though (’cause I’m a bit sad like that) is what search terms lead people to The Romaniacs blog. There are of course the sensible ones, but you don’t want to hear about them. I thought I’d share the Top 10 random search terms that have brought people here:

1) Robert Pattinson body hair

Erm… we haven’t stolen it, honest!

2) Young sperm

This was a cleanish search term. Just to let you know – mention sperm on your blog and you get extra hits as a result.

3) What the world needs is a group hug

I’m inclined to agree and I’m very glad when someone was looking for a group hug they found us.

4) This girl said we are kindred souls

One of The Romaniacs? They are so fickle.

5) Sainsburys singles night

I’m itching to add apostrophes. I do want to know more about this. Do they have an allocated time when you all meet in the pizza aisle?

6) grange hill sausage

I don’t even know what to say about this. Just why? And what?

7) is your name yasmin chat up line

I don’t think it was The Romaniacs they were after. Unless… anyone been putting on a husky voice to fund their writing endeavours?

8) should i get spanx or m & s underwear

Good question. Doubt we helped with the answer. Personally, I have M & S suck it all in pants.

9) subliminal messages to get someone to marry you

Hmm… this has to be a girl asking this, right? In which case, boys don’t do subliminal. Make it obvious or it won’t work. Take them shopping and gasp at gorgeous diamond rings when you pass window displays. That should do the trick.

10) just ate big bag of cadbury buttons !!

You are my kind of person. This is exactly the kind of behaviour The Romaniacs encourage.

Of course, I have skipped over some search terms, but judging by the majority, we could set up an agony aunt column answering all the questions that arrive here. Although each answer would involve reading a good book.

What’s the strangest thing you’ve had to look up on the computer? And what strange search terms have you discovered on your blog/website? Any questions that google hasn’t helped with and you want The Romaniacs to tackle?

Your Agony Aunt, Catherine x

15 thoughts on “You googled WHAT?

  1. Haw, haw! Love it! I had to decorate a top hat for a hen party once. Googled ‘naked male torsos’. Got more than I bargained for. Oooooh! MiGOD! Was on WORK pc. Aaaargh! Also wanted to dangle – ‘ahem’ – certain blown up balloon type objects from rim of hat. Didn’t Google those, obviously. 😉 xx

    • Well, obviously not, Sheryl… (backs away nervously). Is there photographic evidence of this party??

      Celia xxx

    • I would worry about anyone who googled Electic Noseclippers. Why not just set fire to those annoying nasal hairs? Works every time for us Romaniacs. Mind you, we do spend an awful lot of time in A&E,

      Celia xxx

  2. LOL! Brilliant post. My weirdest results occurred when I Googled Large Inflateable Gavel. (You know, a judge’s govel). My manager at work was leaving to do a law degree and we wanted to give her a jokey present. The combination of ‘large’ and ‘inflateable’ prompted all sorts of unexpected results and the firewall blocked me from searching further. OOOPs.

    Weirdest search terms that brought people to my blog? Here’s my top selection:
    1) champagne open ~ well, that’s wholly appropriate, don’t you think?
    2) nose pierced ~ ugh, no. Err, why? And why my blog?
    3) nikki wells stripper ~ what can I say. The devil is in the details (i.e. the spelling of my name, LOL). For the record, I have never stripped (in public) nor will I ever but if the search term brings people to my blog… game on!
    4) zeljko joksimovic nije ljubav stvar ~ No idea what this means. I hope it isn’t rude.

    Love you, Romaniacs, for always putting a smile on my face.

    • And you too, oh scary Queen of Narnia. Have still got furry jacket envy,

      Celia xxx

  3. Hahaha – that’s hilarious, I wonder if the volume of comments I’ve left have had any influence on no 7? : )
    I’ve been so consumed by Nanowrimo that I’ve not kept track of my search engine criteria in the last month but I am normally fascinated by them. I tweet and FB status the insane ones with glee. I once wrote a blog about tits called ‘Breasts, Breasts, Breasts’ and that made the search criteria VERY fruity. God knows what will happen when I post the one I’m planning to pen titled ‘ Sex: From 50 Shades of Grey to Michael Fassbender’s Cock.’ I might genuinely have to have a serious think about that one in light of the reality of Google search and the volume of excitable spammers it might send my way.

    • No, just do it, Yasmin. But please let us know how you get on. It might affect future tags xxx

  4. As one of the taller members of a volleyball team, I play as the middle hitter. I’m not very good, but am improving and always looking to advance my technique. The offensive part of the play is to penetrate to opponents block. There are times with when the opposition block with two players, a double block. Please be cautious when using “penetrate” and “double” in the same search query. Some of the sites returned did not improve my play on court whatsoever.

    • I’m not surprised that Laura sometimes complains of creaky joints now.

      Celia xxx

  5. Brilliant! The best I got was when trying to track down correct info on Victorian corsets and stays for the novel. Got totally led astray into some very dodgy sites on bondage underwear!!

  6. You said in point #2 that mentioning sperm gets you extra hits. It didn’t go unnoticed that you mentioned it twice there. Watch those hit counters rattle… 😀
    Oh darn…now I’ve mentioned it too…here go the pingbacks (no, not the Antarctic water polo team).

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